raccoon oh me oh
Photo by David B. Jack
Otherwise known as Procyon lotor.
The raccoon, sometimes called Gina or psycho bitch monster, is native to Virginia and other eastern environs, but wishes to migrate to the colder, cleaner, northern regions. Being nocturnal mammals, raccoons are prone to sleeping during the day in the suburbs in four poster beds curled up in balls. At night, they constantly hunt for food and entertainment. At Virginia Beach tiny handprints all around town indicate the raccoon has been searching for her favorite things, such as strange indie films, coffee, and cheese. A raccoon will eat almost anything; this is one reason it is such a successful chubby animal. With their tiny hand-like forepaws, the raccoons can pick locks, look through all your stuff, organize everything, and then clean her hands repeatedly.
